Individualism in Classical Musicians

I have bright red hair. You’ve seen it on my website. It’s loud. It ain’t natural by any stretch of the imagination (shout out to my stylist, Tara Abramowicz). I love it, because it’s an external representation of what I feel on the inside. Or if I’m being shy, what I wish I was feeling. I’m also very easy to spot at the flute convention.

I have an oboist friend with hot pink hair and tattoos. She used to play in a regional orchestra in Indiana. Shortly after she left that orchestra, they changed the dress code to include “No unnaturally colored hair”.

Recently, a Facebook friend of mine started a FB conversation on artistic nudity which included a beautiful and fabulous picture of them (presumably) nude with their chest tattoos on display. 

Both of these friends are like me in that we don’t apologize for our loud outward marks of individuality. We revel in them.

But I’ve heard stories of singers being told to leave their hair long, musicians cautioned against any visible tattoos, performers encouraged to have only natural colored hair, and overall be as conservative in appearance as possible. (The horrific body shaming in the voice community is a subject for another day.)

Why are these marks of individualism discouraged to such a high level in our world? 

Because the gatekeepers see them as examples of poor musicianship. If you have a tattoo, you’re not a “serious” classical musician. If you have brightly colored hair, you’ll stick out. If you look like anything but ordinary, you can’t be good at your art.

Sigh. 

No wonder so many folks think our industry is elitist. The gatekeepers, the donors, the people in charge are telling musicians what they can and cannot do with their bodies. What is acceptable and what is not. And they convince us at young ages that if we don’t adhere to the standards from previous generations, that we won’t succeed. What’s even worse, some of these gatekeepers keep some of these young musicians from advancing in their field if they don’t fit the physical picture the gatekeepers’ deem “ideal”. 

I’m not going to lie. I find it so incredibly frustrating. And as someone who blindly followed everything my mentors told me for so so long, every time I venture over the line with my physical appearance, I feel guilty and worry. I worry that I’m making a mistake that will effect my career. I worry that my trio won’t get hired for a performance if the presenter dislikes the color of my hair. And it’s making me stall getting my first tattoo: a memorial piece in honor of my grandmother.

However, there’s something to be said about looking different from others. For standing out, loud and proud. I can’t imagine that I will change any gatekeeper’s minds, but I will absolutely do my own thing and try to keep the guilt away. The fact of the matter is that I’m a damn good musician and having unnaturally red hair didn’t change that. My friend with the chest tattoos has a heavenly, savory voice that I could listen to for hours. And my oboist friend is massively talented on multiple instruments despite (because of??) her pink hair.

I do understand an orchestra’s reasoning for not wanting anyone to stick out. I guess. I don’t like it at all, but I see where they’re coming from. However, younger generations would decidedly appreciate seeing some individuality on display when they go see the orchestra. And don’t we want younger generations to imagine themselves onstage in the orchestra?

So what now? I want the gatekeepers, the major donors, the studio teachers, the administrations of traditional companies to make room for and embrace individuality. And I want those of us who choose to color outside the lines to embrace ourselves and make our decisions without guilt. 

Tomorrow begins my journey towards my first tattoo and I will not feel shame about it.